As if we needed a reminder, the last few months have once again revealed the depth of division and hostility in our nation. There is so much pain, hurt and unhealthy discourse seemingly at every turn. We’re programmed to pick a team and choose sides and shout down the opposition. We’re an increasingly angry people.

In his speech on the U.S. Senate floor in the wake of the Brett Kavanaugh hearings, Sen. Ben Sasse of Nebraska called out in both political parties what is becoming normative in the larger culture as well: blind tribalism. It’s a tendency to malign, perpetuate group think, attack and tear down those in another group.

Tribalism is a threat to our nation, and it’s also a threat to the Church. Our nation needs healing from our divisive, polarizing and tribalistic tendencies. So does the Church.

As spiritual leaders in a hostile world, what do we do? I confess, at times I want to throw up my hands and ask, “What’s the point?” But as the first verse most of us ever memorized says, “For God so loved the world ... .”

It’s not an option to give up on what God loves so much, to abandon what the apostle Paul called the “ministry of reconciliation.” As I’ve processed recently how to make a difference in this culture of hostility, offense and anger, I’m reminded of three principles that have the potential to create unity in a cynical world.

Giving time to seek understanding and build relationship is rarely convenient but often powerful and healing.

1. The power of words. In general, we underestimate the impact of our words. It’s not just the words we speak; it’s also the words we type, and all the creative ways we can disseminate them through the use of technology and social platforms. A kind and encouraging word is becoming so rare.

Against the backdrop of society, we don’t fully understand how positive and healing our well-placed words can be. A commitment to speak life over and into people and places is one of our greatest assets in building trust, unity and hope.

2. The gift of time. In the busyness of our lives, time is a commodity we don’t like to give away. We can be generous with our money, but selfish with our time. The only way to break down tribalism, whether in our nation or in the Church, is to spend time with people from a different tribe. This was the whole point of the Incarnation: that only through personal presence can real relationship and reconciliation be possible. Giving time to seek understanding and build relationship is rarely convenient but often powerful and healing.

3. The benefit of the doubt. We just don’t do this much anymore. To give the benefit of the doubt is to believe the best about someone, to assume pure motives until proven otherwise. Even as Christians, we often do the opposite. To assume the worst about people and foster cynicism is just not becoming for followers of Christ. We can do better. We have to do better, and give the world an alternative to our tribalistic society.

In this season of hope, we must remember that God is with us. His love crosses boundaries of division and brings people together as members of His adopted family. Our mission is to take the message of reconciliation to a world that desperately needs to hear it. 

Adapted from the November/December 2018 edition of Influence magazine.