Few vocations require the kind of spiritual and emotional stamina those who labor on the frontlines of ministry must maintain. A typical pastor is a preacher, scholar, counselor, community relations specialist, administrator, leader, subculture expert, marriage partner, parent, comforter, and soul-care provider.

The pressures from within and outside the church often lead to burnout — and sometimes a full-blown mental health crisis.

If you are a lead pastor, team leader, district leader, or presbyter, you are a minister to ministers. As such, it’s important for you to know the signs of burnout, depression, and even suicidal ideation.

Don’t assume mental illness can never affect the ministers you know. We regularly talk with church leaders who are struggling with these issues. This is a portion of a letter received from an Assemblies of God pastor (shared with permission):

Three years ago, I began a descent into the darkest place of my life. Depression and suicidal thoughts consumed my energy. I had lost focus in ministry. The intimate relationship with the Lord, who once defined my identity, was replaced by my need to be successful. I turned to various program models of worship and leadership instead of Jesus Christ as the source of my sufficiency and direction. I realized I was no longer guided by the Holy Spirit but driven by an image of who I thought I should be for others.

Unsettled problems from this man’s past contributed to his depression and led him to the brink of suicide. A willingness to share his struggle with someone was the first step toward getting the help he desperately needed.

In a 2017 report from Barna Group, nearly half of U.S. pastors said they had suffered from depression at some point over the course of their ministry. Over the past year, many more have struggled.

Just as mental health problems have increased within the general population amid the pandemic, church leaders are feeling the added strain as well. So, what can you do to help your fellow ministers?

Know the Signs

As you work with the ministers under your care, be especially attentive to the following signs of burnout and mental health issues:

• Comments related to persistent hopelessness, despair, sadness, and apathy
• A new habit of showing up late for meetings, being unprepared, or procrastinating essential duties
• A change in physical health, such as drastic weight gain or loss, or new complaints of illness or pain
• Increased cynicism or a sudden lack of empathy toward congregants
• New and persistent complaints about ecclesiastical leadership, the board, or the congregation
• Withdrawal and a desire to escape
• Poor concentration
• Loss of interest in things that once brought joy and restoration
• Negative self-talk
• Loss of esteem, problems with the congregation or board, or setbacks in plans and programs
• Insufficient sleep
• Lack of recreational activities
• A decline in the ability to manage time
• A belief that God doesn’t care or has been unfair
• Comments about marital trouble or diminished sex drive, or evidence of inappropriate sexual behavior (e.g., pornography, illicit massage parlors, extramarital affair)

The accumulation of stress in ministry, combined with a lack of restorative activities, is a recipe for burnout and depression.

Those in ministry are special targets of spiritual attack. If the enemy can bring discouragement to a church leader, he can hinder the work of the gospel.

Provide Support

Be a safe person with whom pastors and staff members can share in confidence their spiritual and emotional struggles. Walk with them in their difficult times, provide options for immediate help, and design a long-term spiritual and mental health regimen for them.

Cultivate an atmosphere of grace, where people feel comfortable sharing their feelings with you and bearing one another’s burdens.

Ministers struggling with depression and suicidal ideation are often ashamed to talk about their problems. They may think they have failed as spiritual leaders. Many people in ministry feel pressure to live up to an unrealistic image of perfection.

The late Richard D. Dobbins, founder of Emerge Counseling Ministries, often said, “It is hard to be honest around people who are trying to appear perfect.”

Some destructive thought patterns are the result of unresolved past issues. Everybody has a history that includes the good, the bad and the ugly. Help the pastor increase self-awareness and understanding by looking back and inward.

Formative experiences and childhood memories play a key role in how we function in adulthood. Mental health crises sometimes arise from family secrets and early trauma.

A secret revealed tends to lose its power. Every pastor needs a pain partner — someone they can trust to share their heart and confide their fears.

Sometimes you simply need to ask some direct, albeit difficult, questions, such as these:

Just as mental health problems have increased within the general population amid the pandemic, church leaders are feeling the added strain as well.

• Do you feel compelled to please others and project an image of being able to do it all?
• Do you set unrealistic goals and have unrealistic expectations of yourself and others?
• Are you experiencing marital or family problems?
• Have you experienced losses in finances, health, esteem, or significant relationships?
• Have you used pornography, alcohol or drugs to self-medicate?

Next Steps

If, after asking these questions, you determine the minister to be at risk for self-harm, what should you do next?

Ask whether the person has the intention, means and plans to do self-harm. Let him or her know you have an obligation to provide care and that you must break confidence to obtain help. You may need to call 911 or contact a close family member. You might offer to escort the person to the hospital or nearest emergency care facility.

Remember these four R’s:

• Rapport. Keep the person talking until you can obtain help.
• Reassurance. Provide encouragement and hope through Spirit-directed words, Scripture, prayer, and an offer to walk with the person through this dark valley.
• Revelation. Listen with empathy and understanding. Help the person see there are other alternatives to self-harm, such as seeking medical help, taking a sabbatical, resting, and developing a more constructive rhythm of life.
• Reorganization. Help the person evaluate and modify routines and take positive steps toward better health.

Bereavement Ministry

Sadly, you may find yourself in the position of comforting the family of a minister who committed suicide.

Compassion is crucial. The family will likely experience guilt and shame — guilt for not having seen the signs or done more to prevent the death, and shame because of taboos surrounding suicide.

Of course, there will be theological questions as to the eternal destiny of the deceased. Remind the family God is good and righteous. He cares for their loved one and knows all things, including the person’s internal struggles.

Don’t allow death by suicide to be all that defines the deceased. Take the person’s whole life into account. Grieve with those who grieve, and don’t focus on the “why” and “how” questions.

Many parishioners are curious about the details and often want to know more than they need to know. Let the family determine which details of their loved one’s death should be shared publicly.

Remember, there are many factors leading up to a person’s decision to take the drastic step of suicide. This is a time for listening, not problem solving. Provide sacred space to let the family and congregation process their emotions.

Not every question has to have an answer on this side of eternity. Sometimes it is far better just to sit with those who are grieving than to offer answers. Assure the family and church that Jesus’ promise to be with us always is a reliable source of comfort (Matthew 28:20).

Frequent follow-up is critical, and referral to a local grief support group is highly recommended.

Your ongoing care for a post-suicidal family and church will keep them anchored to Christ and to one another.

Find ways to celebrate and commemorate the person’s life. Contribute to a cause in the community, especially something that was important to the deceased. The family may also suggest that in lieu of flowers, donations be made to a cause that was meaningful to their loved one.

Help the entire congregation through the grief process. Normalize their grief rather than deny its true and raw emotions. Pray through the pain. Let people know it is OK to cry out openly and honestly to God.

Allow time and space for the Holy Spirit to help the congregation see the painful situation in a more redemptive way, and thank God for the grace and strength He gives in our time of greatest need.

Preach on depression, grief, loss, and unanswered questions related to death by suicide. Texts might include God’s question to Cain in Genesis 4:6; His compassion for Hagar in Genesis 21:9–12; and the Messiah’s ministry to the brokenhearted and grief-stricken in Isaiah 61:1–3.

There are numerous examples of people in the Bible who struggled with depression and hopelessness. You might wish to do a survey of Job, Elijah or Jonah, for example.

Keep in mind that once you talk openly about these tough topics, many people will feel safe to share their own fears and concerns. As a result, your counseling load may greatly increase.

Hope and Healing

In Christ, there is help and hope for the hurting. Jesus is able to turn around the situations of ministers who are contemplating the unthinkable.

The letter from the Assemblies of God pastor goes on to testify about God’s ability to change lives:

God’s supernatural power and love kept me from destruction. Jesus walked into my room in the psychiatric hospital, and everything started to change. I have found my way back to sitting and resting at the feet of Jesus and discovering His resurrection power once again. Most importantly, I have my identity back as God’s son, and that is all I really need to be successful.

Being a leader to leaders is a daunting task. But it is also an opportunity to advance God’s kingdom by shepherding those who shepherd others.

One of the most important ways to promote healthy habits is to model them. Be aware of the emotions in your own life that surface when dealing with various types of crises. Find a pain partner with whom you can share your heart. Seek counseling when you need it.

You are a burden bearer to those who are in ministry. This calls for compassion, as well as a willingness to do difficult things and ask difficult questions.

Ask God to examine your heart and reveal any issues that need attention — and to give you insight, discernment and grace as you point others toward the life-giving power of Jesus.

This article appears in the January–March 2021 edition of Influence magazine.