The scope of ministry to women is changing, and it is becoming more challenging. As a 1980s baby, I have faint memories of the old days of women’s ministries — complete with images of aprons and craft projects. My mom led the women’s group at our church, so I grew up helping with all the showers and events.

Then I became a young woman. I remember feeling awkward at women’s meetings because I didn’t enjoy chocolate and chats or crafts. Yet I wanted to be part of a “sisterhood.” When I married and began to navigate life transitions, the hardships of ministry, and even traumatic loss, I not only desired sisterhood, I desperately needed it.

Today, I serve as the women’s director for the Southern New England Ministry Network of the Assemblies of God. In addition, my husband, Brad, and I are the lead pastors of Essence Place (AG), a church plant in West Hartford, Connecticut. In these roles, I have the opportunity to care for and disciple women in my community and across our district.

Over the years, I’ve had conversations with church leaders — both men and women — who asked, “Why do we need women’s ministries?”

Others have said of women’s ministries, “I’ve been there, done that, and won’t do it again.”

I get it. I really do. Women’s ministries have gotten a bad rap at times. As a young 30-something, I had my share of harsh opinions. But I also remember my longing for sisterhood, and I believe every woman experiences this at some level. God created people for community. All human beings have a need for belonging and togetherness. Furthermore, women need women.

God hard-wired into us a need for friendship. Especially in times of stress, women desire community and often seek it out. Sharing our stories and our lives with others is important. Even as an intense introvert, I find that talking with a friend is a great stress reliever. God created each woman differently, with a unique temperament, likes and dislikes, hobbies and interests; but we are all still women, and that provides its own commonality.

Women occupy a majority of the seats in most churches, and they need connection and friendship. Those who have a sense of community are more likely to get involved, serve and lead. It’s time to let go of preconceived ideas regarding women’s ministries and recognize that there is a clear need for intentional and defined ministry to women.

So, how should we approach ministry to women? First and foremost, every pastor must speak to the needs of his or her congregation. The vision for each ministry is unique and dependent on the community and culture. Regardless, we must recognize our responsibility as leaders to disciple, guide and facilitate opportunity for community.

There is something powerful about a sisterhood of women encouraging and building up one another as they draw closer to Jesus together.

Maybe a traditional women’s group is not the way to go — and I would argue that it probably isn’t if you’re thinking of clichéd activities and structures. Be willing to seek God’s heart for the women in your congregation and the community that surrounds you. Here are seven steps to take as you work through this process:

1. Acknowledge the importance of ministry to women. Plan intentional moments for women to connect relationally and receive discipleship, mentoring and training. Such environments provide opportunities to meet the needs of women and cultivate their gifts.

2. Redefine women’s ministries, and let go of past mistakes. Ministry to women goes beyond monthly organized events and competition for resources and calendar space. Activity — relational or not — is just activity without intentionality and consideration for every woman involved. Honor and value the history of women’s ministries, and then seek Spirit-inspired vision for where God wants to take the women in your church today.

3. Abandon stereotypes. God created each woman uniquely. Nothing is more frustrating in our culture today than stereotypes. Women share some similarities, but the gender stereotypes must go. More than ever before, we must find our identity in Christ and revel in the unique gifts, interests and callings that He gives us. We are missing an opportunity to help women discover their worth and value in Christ when we insist on culturally inspired stereotypes to define our activities, events and discipleship processes. We must look at our specific community, pray for wisdom and understanding, and move forward with sensitivity as the Spirit leads.

4. Help women go beyond the surface. Women today desire holistic discipleship, not just spiritual instruction. What do I mean by this? We want to see the transformation of Christ in our lives go beyond behavior modification or trite encouragement. The women I encounter are seeking discipleship that reaches the deepest recesses of the soul, heart and mind. I recently led a women’s leadership conference that primarily focused on caring for the soul and being emotionally and spiritually healthy. We brought in both a mental health professional and a pastor to teach. The response was overwhelmingly positive, and we have received requests for more teaching on these topics.

5. Speak to today’s issues. Our world is changing rapidly. We need Spirit-empowered women to lead conversations on culturally relevant topics, guide us in Scripture, and teach us to apply God’s truths to whatever challenges we face.

6. Provide places for women to disciple women. Women face unique issues that other women can best speak to: motherhood, gender roles and biases, abuse, infertility, abortions, body image and more. We need Spirit-empowered ministry to women, from women. There is something powerful about a sisterhood of women encouraging and building up one another as they draw closer to Jesus together.

7. Train women leaders. Let’s champion women in leadership. Despite how far we have come, there are still more women than men in our churches and fewer women than men in church leadership. We need to disciple, train and mentor women to lead, teach, pastor and disciple others. The best and most intentional way to do this is through specific ministry to women.

Reaching any demographic involves challenges and requires wisdom. Yet there is value in intentionally ministering to women. God specializes in taking what seems complicated or difficult, and turning it into something amazing.